My best friend passed away four years ago this summer. I'd known him since fifth grade. Before he passed we were working on a podcast and a possible book. I still can't watch any videos of him.
Today I ordered Kurt Vonnegut: The Complete Novels: A Library of America Boxset on a whim (not an affiliate link). One of his favorite authors. I've only read Slaughterhouse-Five (on his recommendation).
I had no plans to buy it and I already picked up Slapstick a few years ago (I have yet to read it). But it was on sale and I've been wanting to do some kind of memorial for him.
Reading a series of books is fitting. I'm tempted to make a thing of it. This feels like a Youtube challenge to be honest. Is that me or the influence of media and attention? No, I know. It's media and attention.
Let's ignore that. I think it's going to be this. Just this post.
Maybe I'll update after each book I finish. Maybe after everything was read. Who knows. I'm slow and inconsistent so it's going to be a marathon to get through them.
I'm glad I'm choosing this. I was thinking of a marathon. He would have thought that was the dumbest idea ever.
My thirties have been a decade a grief. Papaw, Dad, then my friend. It's been fours years without my best friend and four years in therapy. Much needed therapy. And in all that time, it's hard to understand how much of a long tail grief has. You would think after four years, I wouldn't need to impulse buy a book collection and dedicate myself to reading it in his honor.
But you know the old saying "So it goes".